In The Now

Every year, we gather to remember the sacrifices of those who have given so much in defense of our ideals and our freedom. It is important because of the direct effect those lives, that innocence, given so willingly has meant for us, as regards our way of life and the high standards of living. It is also important because it helps us to realize that there are things outside of ourselves which are important to acknowledge.

So much of each day is filled with self-absorption, looking inward. I need, I want, I get to… Even as an adult, a husband, and a parent, I am constantly concerned with me and mine. The kids need, Kim needs, the house needs, gotta take the car in…

I give back. I volunteer my time as a Cub leader. I coach sports teams. I help out at Engaged Encounter weekends, showing engaged couples to their rooms, and trying to ease them into an immense and intimidating weekend.

All of this seems like nothing compared to the sacrifices that members of the Canadian military make. They sacrifice their lives, certainly, but even those who return physically sound have sacrificed things that I will never fully understand.

Apart from the innocence that is stripped by the taking of a life, which could be the subject of a blog post – or a book, a library – there is the separation that a soldier undergoes. Things change, people change. Fathers of children got and still get deployed overseas and miss out on large chunks of their children’s lives.

All of this hit me today as I watched the laying of the wreaths at the Butterdome cenotaph during the Remembrance Day ceremonies. I usually don’t make it out of that ceremony with dry eyes, but I’ve never really had the reality of what soldiers had to, and still have to face shown to me so clearly. One of the first people to place a wreath was a widow whose husband died in Afghanistan earlier this year. Beyond her personal grief is the fact of a family left without a father.

I think long and hard on my duties as a father. How much of being a good father is being there for your children? How much is providing a roof, food, and the necessities? I think and hope that evaluating what I’m doing makes me a better father. Not better than other fathers. It’s not for me to judge others and their parenting. Instead, I mean better than yesterday. Anyway, I think of this father, this soldier, caught in this same dilemma, only on a scale that I can’t really imagine. Duty as a father, duty as a soldier, providing for his family, keeping his country safe. Suddenly, my employment woes and having to wait an entire week to have an interview doesn’t seem quite so trying.

It is good to be reminded that my life and the influences on it are not the only things going on in the world. There is a lot that is a lot bigger than me and there are a lot of people whose sacrifices are a lot greater than mine. And it is for these people I am thankful. For them, I will respect, remember, and recognize.

Filed under: Uncategorized by Liam